Twelve Signs That Your Ex wants You Back

You and your ex have had a parting of the ways but now you have this sinking feeling that the break up was a mistake. If she also had the same regrets as yours, then you might stand a decent chance at getting her back. But asking her straight out may be too chancy, so perhaps some subtlety is needed here.
Before anything else, think over the nature of the breakup. How severe was the situation? If the difficulties were over small things that finally blew up into something big, she’ll probably want to come back after a little cooling off.
It’s less clear if more serious issues were at the heart of the break up. If this is your situation then you need to tune into the small signals from your ex that she wants you back. Here are twelve:
1.) Is she having adjustment problems? If she is, then her relationship with you is still important to her. It means that she too is hurting from this loss.
2.) Does she want to be friends with you? This means that she’s unable to completely let go. Remaining friends with her is very advantageous. It keeps intact an open channel of communication. Over time, this can be leveraged to get her back.
3.) Does she tend to apologize for some of things that she said during the heat of the break up? This indicates a desire to make amends.
4.) Does she volunteer compliments about you when you talk? Even an indirect compliment about something that you own has significance.
5.) Is your ex seeing someone else? If she’s not involved with anyone and you’ve been separated for a while, it could mean that she values the relationship the both of you had. Perhaps no one else measures up.
6.) Has she stayed in contact with you? This means calling you up, returning your phone calls, and engaging in conversation with you.
7.) What do her eyes and body language tell you? If she has an interest in you, her eyes will widen and her brows will lift slightly when she first notices your presence. You should also look for dilated pupils. Be alert to prolonged eye contact when you converse as well as her making small adjustments to her hair.
8.) Another indication of interest is mirroring. Mirroring is a subtle imitation by her of your mood or of your body language. Other things she may mirror include the rhythm, loudness and tone of your speech.
9.) Is the word “you” used a lot in her speech when she talks to you? If so, she is using second person speech which is a more personal way of communicating than third person speech.
10.) Is she still doing the small favors for you like she did in the past? She wouldn’t be doing this if she had no interest in you.
11.) Does she conclude a lot of her sentences with a question asking for approval or agreement? The questions at the end of her sentences are an attempt to draw you deeper into the conversation.
12.) Finally, be alert to any sort of nostalgic talk about your past relationship.
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Comments on Twelve Signs That Your Ex wants You Back »
nik @ 11:07 pm
hi my name is nik and i just broke up with my girlfriend 3 weeks ago i we had our ups and downs she gave me some chances 1st i wrecked her car the 1st week or so we were together then i had a addition problem after my surgerys and she kind of forgave me for all of them but about 3 months ago i lost my job and i have been searching for a new one but i felt like a loser around her and didnt want to talk about it at all nor be around anyone we talked everyday and told each other we loved each other and stuff like that but she felt that i thought she was ugly and fat and all those things and she is not any of those at all i love her with all my heart and i am trying to show her that i have contacted via text messages thats all and she awnsers bac very nicely but how do i get her back without smoothering her in any way and i asked her out to dinner and she just said no its to soon i am sorry so she is being really nice how do i do this because it is killing me down deep
admin @ 1:59 pm
Hi Nik. It sounds like losing your job has caused a lot of changes in the way that you relate to her. She senses this and may feel that it has to do with her. If you haven’t told her how your job loss has affected you, she may mistake your “down feelings” about not having a job as down feelings about her.
We are in a recession and times are hard for everyone. Being unemployed happens to almost everyone so try not to be too hard on yourself.
It’s a very good sign that she still answers your text messages. If she thinks it’s too soon to get back together, then try be her best friend for now. Say things that will make her feel better and try to be more upbeat in your messages. Put more energy and confidence into your job search. How we feel about ourselves also affects how others feel about us.
Good luck.