A tactic is a plan for attaining a particular goal. In this case, the goal is getting your girl back and mending the root cause of the break up.
1.) To start, you will need to gradually ease her back into the relationship. A wound does not heal overnight. Some time will be needed to heal your broken relationship.
Rather than trying to fix things up as fast as possible, you should allow about a month to let things cool off. During this time, you should be assessing the relationship itself. You’ll need to consider things like whether you really do want her back and what changes you’ll have to make to get the relationship to work.
2.) After this “chilling out” period, you’ll need to reopen the lines of communication with her again. It’s important that you establish a level of comfort with her. This means being friends and being able to communicate in a relaxed way.
There can’t be any discussions on heavy topics that place pressure on her. This isn’t the time yet to be talking about the break up or any other serious relationship issues. There’s a time for this type of talk but it will be at a later stage.
If it’s too difficult to establish a friendship, then you may need to allow more cooling off time. However, one month really should be the maximum. Too much time apart will allow your partner to adapt or get too comfortable with living without you. It also increases the chances of another love rival to enter the picture.
3.) There will come a time when the issue of resuming the relationship will have to be discussed. Bringing this up will be a very awkward and delicate moment. However, you can’t be spending too much time with her as a friend. If there is no chance of getting her back, you need to know this so that you can move on.
Don’t be putting too much expectation in her agreeing right away with coming back. A response that is non-committal means that the possibility of restarting the relationship still exists in her mind. It will simply require more time for her to know one way or the other.
4.) One “trick” that you can try is to take advantage of something that everyone does. What I’m talking about here is the tendency for all of us to replay certain events repeatedly in our minds. Whenever someone says or does something that causes a strong emotion, we tend to rehash that moment over and over again in our heads.
This is how we process our feelings about a particular emotional event. Typically this will happen when someone unexpectedly says something mean or snide that takes us off guard. However, this can also be triggered with an unexpected compliment or dramatic gesture.
In order for this to work, you’ll need to elicit a strong positive emotion from her. This has to be a nice gesture or compliment that she would never expect to come from you.
If you succeed in this, she will be savoring this repeatedly in her mind when she’s alone. Her good feelings about you will get strengthened and reinforced with each “replay”. You probably won’t be able to induce this state more than a few times, but one or two times is all you’ll need.
Skillful use of these tactics should make a real difference in your efforts to win her back.
Want a complete step by step guide that fills in all of the details of this strategy? Check out this review of the Magic of Making Up.
Filed under break up advice by admin
