Five Common Reasons Couples Break Up
The things that can go wrong in a relationship seem to be endless.
Given the differences between the sexes, friction is inevitable. Sometimes the conflicts are so frequent and violent that a permanent breakup is the best thing to do.
Often however, couples break up for silly little reasons that blow up over time. You can avoid this by recognizing and dealing with the following most common reasons for a breakup.
All of these reasons stem from self centeredness and can be avoided by remembering that you are part of a couple. Your concerns must include those of your partner as well as your own.
1.) Not Caring About The Feelings Of Your Partner
When you are troubled by something or if something fantastic has happened, you’d naturally want to share this with your partner. Imagine him or her not listening or bothering to respond. How would this make you feel?
Remember, you’re part of a couple now, the concerns of the other are your concerns as well. The key here is listening and thoughtfully responding.
2.) Being A Control Freak
Relationships aren’t perfect democracies. It’s only natural that there will be a dominant person in the couple. This is largely determined by the personality types involved. When the dominant member over does it, the relationship stands on rocky ground. No one wants to be treated as a slave or a robot.
There are many reasons for controlling behavior, most of which are pathological. If you find yourself doing this, stop it right now. Understand that your partner is a person with needs that you should be concerned about.
- Your partner avoids you. This can occur in a variety of ways. He or she may be spending excessive time away at work or with friends. He/she is always volunteering for business trips and makes up excuses about why he or she can’t be with you that don’t add up.
- He or she becomes less communicative. Some people are very quiet by nature but even they have their normal communication patterns.
- You are on the receiving end of psychologically abusive, insulting remarks. These remarks aren’t the “slip of the tongue” variety that can happen in a heated argument but take place on an ongoing basis.
- All forms of negativity get progressively worse over time.
3.) Cheating On Your Partner
This is a very serious offense that in many circumstances is unforgivable. In addition to the emotional trauma that you’ll be causing, you’re also exposing your partner to disease.
If you find that you can’t control this very base instinct, you don’t belong in any relationship. You should resign yourself to remaining a solitary individual for the rest of your life.
4.) Lack Of Fun And Spontaneity
This is often the fate of many relationships. After you’ve spent a lot of time with another person, they become so familiar that boredom slowly creeps in. Everything requires maintenance over time and your relationship is no exception. If you want your love to remain strong you’ll have to put some energy and imagination into keeping it enjoyable.
5.) Allowing Fights To Escalate Out Of Control
A little self restraint now and then is never a bad thing. Diplomacy can be useful as well. A small unresolvable issue can really blow up over time.
It’s best to understand why the same argument keeps surfacing and to do something about it. Arguments in general are normal but be careful not to allow them to become a habit. They can get worse in severity if both partners get reactive or ‘touchy’. If the fight is over a small matter then just give in. There’s no shame in agreeing to take the trash out.
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Comments on Five Common Reasons Couples Break Up
yep. cheatting is def. a big issue. quite sad 2 b honest. my ex fooled me so bad i had 2 do a double take when i found out…..and it wasn’t from him. And like a fool, i didn’t break up with him. i wouldn’t say i loved him but i def. had feelings for this guy and i cared for him deeply that i couldnt bring myself to that point at the time. then after hearing bs and putting up with him for a while longer i told myself i deserved better. so i just up and left and told him there wasn’t any getting back. I even wished him well with his life.
i agree that cheating on your partner is totally unforgivable.my 2-year boyfriend cheated on me,.not just once or twice.whats worst is he keeps in denying and fooling me. maybe i really love him that much because i still forgive him hoping that he will change.but he only prove to me that if he’s capable of doing it then he can do it AGAIN.i was so devastated and feel that my world is crushing on me.but i guess life doesnt stop from there and i need to move on..good thing know theres a lot of online advices on how to cope a bad breakup.thanks
You should get the help of a professional marriage councilor. These are very serious issues.
one thing that isnt in any couples book any where is what is a married cuople to do when they love each other and they are married and one male child molest the younger step female child and the couple is forced to split up and looses one female child and is going thru a bad battle etc..how dose the couple being in love save their marrige…we r soul mates and want to grow old together.
Really true. I am into a relationship for a year now.. and i seriously agree that these r the major things that appear problematic. i wish all guys out thee would get to read this and really comprehend it.