Comments on: Break Up Pain – How To Move Past A Painful Break Up

By: cheska

cheska — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 13:43:12 +0000

Only weeks have passed since i’ve decided to end my relationship with my boyfriend for 2 years. It was a very painful break up since he decided already to marry a girl whom he only meet for a month and the most painful is he keeps on telling me that he loves me so much and he does not love that girl and i keep on asking him, “what’s the reason of getting married to her if you doesn’t love her”? and in fact it was he’s decision to marry not his parents decision. He just keep on saying sorry and he said that he didn’t mean it…He keeps on telling me lies and it hurts me so much. In fact there are a lot of instances that he lied to me but i forgive him because for me it should not be a reason for me to break up with him. I’ve trusted him so much.
We have an open relationship before and almost all my relatives and friends known him and the same with him and so it was really painful to forget him.

There are a lot of details in our break up but i doesn’t want anymore to talk about it all coz it only hurts me.
i’ve read your article and it was really helpful. in fact, that was what i really applied to my self.

it was really good to have your friends that you can lean on whenever you are down. in my case, days after our break up, i only cry and cry and cry to my friends. i share to them what have happened during our break up and they always asks me to come with them in order for me to move on.
they said that i should accept the fact that we are not really meant for each other and there are a lot of persons more deserving than him…i am a cheerful and jolly person and i use it in order to surpass the struggles in my life but there is still a place in my heart that is crying and i admit it. I still love him but i am learning to live without him….

By: robsi

robsi — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 16:39:49 +0000

@Pauline:
Thanks for your advised i guess you are right, I’ll but it hurts yea

By: Pauline

Pauline — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 09:58:54 +0000

@Marc: Thanks alot for your advise but i have decided to end things completely with him.I realised all along he has been cheating on me and he used my anger to make me end the relationship, guess he fooled me. He actually wanted the relationship to end thats why my efforts of getting him back had not been successful. But am now glad i know the truth coz its all that counts, now i just have to move on and find someone worthy.

By: jezz

jezz — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 09:25:12 +0000

@dano: i'm here

By: Candice

Candice — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 01:33:36 +0000

Iv recently left my fiance of 4 years, its been 2 months and he has a gf already.. I miss him like crazy and the thing is we have 2 children together so i have to talk and see him every weekend.. It hurts.

By: Marc

Marc — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 14:46:43 +0000

@Pauline: Your relationship can be made to work if both of you put in the effort. Both of you should think of your relationship as something that has great potential provided that you give it the work and maintenance it requires. Understand that you can learn to communicate. You say that you are quick to anger but you can change that. While there are better ways for your ex to respond when you get angry, I have to credit him for not matching your anger with equal anger. There is plenty of information on the web on anger management. Find it and act on it. I have sent an email to you with a file attachment. It spells out a set of “rules of engagement” that couples can use for dealing with conflicts. It says that it is about how to apologize, but I think it is really about how couples should behave in difficult situations. Both of you should read it. Your ex will learn a better way of coping than passively waiting for you to calm down.

So in summary:

For you – do some research on anger management and act on it. Changing this happens gradually over time. Each time you react it should be less intense than before. Taking baby steps is key.

For you and him – read the file attachment that I have emailed to you. It may seem like an artificial way to behave but it works.

By: Pauline

Pauline — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 06:19:10 +0000

@Jaimee: Of course you can move on. The fact that he cheating on you means that he is not worth your love and even if you get back together what guarantees he wont cheat? i think you should pull yourself together and concentrating on finding someone who trully deserves you and wont cheat on you.

By: Pauline

Pauline — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 06:15:11 +0000

@robsi: This guy does not deserve you, you are too good for him. I think you should try to move on and find someone worthy of your love.

By: Pauline

Pauline — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 06:12:23 +0000

I have just ended my relationship with a guy i have been dating for almost an year. We had an argument although it was over a petty issue i got agree and broke up with him, we argue alot. I still love him but i do not want to live a live full of arguments. He is not a bad person at all and he understands i am quick to anger and if i get angry he just keeps quite and waits for me to cool down. We do not communicate instead we argue. I really love him and am confused if i should just move on or get back with coz he also claims that he is also so hurt because of our break up.
Please advice me on what to

By: robsi

robsi — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 08:17:43 +0000

My so called boyfriend is been hurting me every now and then and i don’t know why am i not able to move on. The moment he comes infront of me just cant get angry on him, u know the best new year’s gift for me is he has disappeared without any explanation, he gave me a rose on the 1st and since then his number is switch off and he’s no where around. i called his friend to ask if he is fine and yes he is all good,,,,,i dont know wats going on he has done this twice before and he did promise he wunt repeat it, is he finding a way to go back,,and If he calls up do u think i should talk to him….??